How to prioritise self-care.

How do you feel about self care?

A woman with a cup of matcha latte in her hand — My 'Me-Time' matcha latte.

I hear all sorts of responses to this question...

Some of us are all for it - we can’t live without it and promote it from the rooftops.

Some of us find the notion uncomfortable or even fight against it - we think it’s a fluffy thing that people with too much time do or we wish we could do, in another life.

Some of us think we’re doing it by having a daily shower, drinking enough water or doing the occasional bit of exercise - but these things are actually necessary things

for us to function, not self-care.

What is self-care?

Here is my definition:

Choosing to be kind to yourself by thinking about your needs, wants and desires and then taking action on those things. This gives you joy, peace and fulfilment so you can be the best version of yourself.

What does self-care look like to you?

I have daily and weekly self-care practices that I prioritise and promote that help me live my best life. As a working mum, I’ve had to strengthen these even more so that I can be creative, productive and energised at home and work. Here are a some of mine:

Sleep hygiene - around 9pm I stop using my phone, tidy, pack for the next day, do my skin and teeth routine, read my Kindle and try to be asleep by 10pm.
Morning routine - this got derailed since being a mum so now it’s a bit different. I do a home workout 3-4x per week as soon as I wake up, with my baby. We then listen to relaxing music and have breakfast together, and occasionally I get to do a bit of journaling.
Exercise - I either exercise at home or I go to the gym before work, after childcare drop off. Some of my clients like swimming and walking so I can sometimes combine work with exercise.
Food and drink - I take Athletic Greens (vitamin and minerals), drink plenty of water and try and eat as much veg, salad, fruit and nuts/seeds as possible.
Connecting with loved ones - I often call or FaceTime my friends and family and I try to meet up with people and do something fun every week.
Prayer and meditation - I can easily feel overwhelmed being a working mum (and now launching my own business!) so throughout the day I often pray, listen to music and relax or meditate to ground myself and get a positive perspective.
Being honest - Naming how I'm feeling or what's going on for me (to myself and others), so that I can share my needs and be myself and, hopefully, encourage others to do the same.
Me time - Most weekends my hubby and I tag team, so I get half a day to go to the gym/pool/spa and have a chilled morning or work on my business in peace (with a lovely matcha latte).
Coaching - I regularly meet my coach who helps me keep on track with my goals whilst being kind to myself and doing the things that give me life.

What gets in the way of prioritising self care?

Time? Work? Commitments? Tiredness? Sickness? Motivation? Money? Responsibilities (caring for others)? Not prioritising yourself.

Why prioritise self-care?

We are all unique glorious beings with a purpose and a calling and if we don’t prioritise self-care, aka our health and happiness, how can we give the world the best version of us? Even Jesus turned things down and took time for himself to rest or pray.

Something to ponder….

Kindness starts from within. Can you be kinder to yourself in order to be kind to others?

What have you done lately that brought you joy?

Imagine you, at your healthiest, happiest, most energised, most loving, most creative and fulfilled. What do you see? What self-care practices did you prioritise in order to get there?

What happens if we don’t prioritise self-care?

We could spend our days striving: working, cooking, cleaning, running around, trying to have good relationships, trying to make money and raise good kids. Or trying to lose or distract ourselves on screens, with food or other substances. And we could lose ourselves and our spark along the way.

How can you prioritise self-care?

Find your motivation by asking yourself: What is important to you about self-care? How will it benefit your life?
Define what you want more of.
Decide what you need to let go of.
Make a commitment to doing that 1 thing that gives you joy, creativity, energy, peace or fulfilment this week (and if it works, you could add something the following week).
Tell a friend/partner/housemate and ask them to keep you accountable (maybe block it in your calendar or make a reminder).

Remember, this is about what YOU want, need, desire - not what others think.

Self-care doesn’t need to cost you money, but you will need to let go of certain things in your life to make room for it. You may feel some internal resistance at first, but overtime I am positive that you (and your world) will benefit from it!

If you want coaching to help build some self-care practices or work on other personal, professional or business goals email me at hello@bethoneillcoaching.com